We celebrated a wonderful Christmas with our daughter and her partner in California. Both families were invited to come and enjoy everything Christmas implies: family time, beautiful decorations, gift giving, fabulous food and togetherness. We baked and decorated Christmas cookies and strung popcorn and cranberries to festoon the tree. We drove around to see the decorations that graced so many of the homes in Riverside, California. We walked through the venerable Mission Inn Hotel which has an amazing light display. And even though we went away for a good part of the Christmas season, we decorated our home in Florioda with a lovely tree and other bits and pieces.
It was a Christmas to remember.
Then came New Year’s which we welcomed with good friends at a party here in Solivita. We drank champagne and enjoyed music and a ball drop.
So, our holidays were suitably festive.
Some people as they get older stop going for all the falderal associated with holidays. It is tempting to do that. Decorating a tree and dusting off all the little angels, Santas and so on that I love seeing at Christmas takes time. You have to drag the boxes out of the garage and unwrap it all. Then a month later, you have to put it all back again.
I am happy that we went to that trouble. I take great pleasure in seeing my little tree and enjoy the Santas and other decorations I place around the house. To me, it wouldn’t be Christmas without those trappings.
I think that if we stopped celebrating holidays, our lives would be diminished. What would we look forward to, if we didn’t see the holidays as a special time? Just another day—another Sunday or Monday or whatever? Holidays give us a reason to stop and savor life. For many of us, it is a time to think about those we love, to spend time with them, even to tell them that we love them. For many, it is a time to observe certain comforting rituals: baking cookies, going to church, giving gifts, enjoying a feast with family and friends.
No matter what holiday you celebrated, I hope yours was a happy as mine. And I hope that the holidays have given you the energy and strength to face the coming year with joy.
HAPPY NEW YEAR enjoy your stories
Thanks! Happy New Year to you, too.
sounds like you had a perfect holiday season
kathy Riggs told me that you and Dan had spent Christmas with Brenda and her partner in California. I love the Christmas holidays and always have. We went on an 8 day cruise with my longtime girlfriend [63 years] and her fella. They stayed through New Years and we had a wonderful time.
I’m happy you had a great holiday, too!
I think one of the problems with decorating as we get older is that we may have not been entirely true to ourselves earlier when we were raising children. To the exent that we did all the hoopla for the kids, it is difficult to go through all the hassle just for ourselves. Skipping it for a year or two is a good idea if we’re sick of it or are grieving the loss of old connections, but I think it’s helpful to use the time we might have spent decorating and celebrating to mourn our losses, to build new relationships and then to reconnect with the hoiday traditions that are meaningful for us.
One Christmas day when my children were entering their teens, we all seemed to be in a bad mood. We dedicated the rest of the day to being visibly sad, mad, resentful and disappointed. We took turns voicing our displeasure, and as the day went on we became so grandiose in our rantings that we all started laughing. Christmases for years after were tremendously fun occasions.
Recently, I spent a Christmas season where I couldn’t be in contact with two of my grandchildren and decorating felt like way too much trouble. Remembering my earlier experience of allowing myself to feel whatever I felt, I didn’t decorate that year and allowed myself to miss them and cry instead. In subsequent years, I’ve cut back on decorating–the parts I had started doing for them–and brought out only the things I love and followed only the traditions that bring me happiness and connection. This past Christmas, I was reunited with one of my lost grandchildren, and had all my children together for the first time in about 20 years. We had a blast.
I feel lucky to have escaped the tyranny of joy that often surrounds the holidays. I truly wish there were Bah,humbug support groups easily available to everyone where genuine feelings were accepted and released–but, fortunately, nothing can stop us from having our own or starting one with others who are having trouble enjoying the holidays.
Thank you for sharing this personal anecdote. We, too have cut back on decorating and have chosen to only place the things we really love around the house. I find that I enjoy this far more than exhausting myself doing what is expected.